


Safer to Hate Him

by clockworkinsanity



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Declarations Of Love, Derek Hale is Bad at Feelings, Derek is an overgrown five year old with too many feelings, Fluff and Angst, I Blame Tumblr, I Don't Even Know, I Tried, Kind of AU, M/M, One Shot, Poor Stiles, Sappy, sterek
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-30
Updated: 2014-03-30
Packaged: 2018-01-17 14:40:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1391449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/clockworkinsanity/pseuds/clockworkinsanity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Walked hand in hand with your trust,<br/>And everybody was kissing on fire,<br/>And we all got burnt."<br/>*<br/>The one where Stiles (kind of) breaks into Derek's loft during the summer and demands for an explanation as to why Derek seems to hate him so much, especially since he's saved his life more than once. The answer he receives is a little different to what he was expecting.<br/><br/>[this fic was written three years ago and no longer accurately reflects the quality of my writing, however i'm leaving it up for sentimental reasons]</p>
            </blockquote>





	Safer to Hate Him

**Author's Note:**

> (edit: I don't especially like this fic any more, and i can't read it without cringing wildly, but people seemed to like it so i'm going to leave it up and pretend I had nothing to do with it.)
> 
> \---
> 
> This one shot is basically the product of me pondering over why the hell Derek actually hates Stiles so much while listening to 'Safer To Hate Her' by You Me At Six. The lyrics (as seen in the summary) kind of spoke to me, and as a massive Sterek shipper I figured out an answer to my ponderings through this fic.
> 
> This fic is un-beta'd, though I've gone over it myself to the best I can. If you would like to look over it for me properly, however, let me know.
> 
> Timeline: Set between S2 and S3A while the majority of the pack is off school for summer (meaning that S3 would've probably been a little different had this happened).

Derek had noticed something was wrong by the time he was halfway down the corridor leading to the loft. There was a scent in the air that there shouldn’t have been – someone had been here while Derek was out. Nobody usually ever came up here, except for his small pack of teenage werewolves and his uncle. Peter, however, was out of town at the moment and the pack would have let him know if they’d wanted to speak to him and he hadn’t been home. It was one of the good things about them.

He checked his phone. No missed calls or texts, nothing.

As he advanced further down the corridor, now moving at a quicker pace, he was able to notify that not only was the scent human, but that the person hadn’t left. They were just sitting there, waiting for him inside of the loft. He doubted that it would be hunters; they just weren’t stupid enough to try this much of a blunt attack, especially since the Argents knew that he knew their scents. No, it wasn’t Chris, Allison or any of their cronies, it was-

Derek furiously unlocked the door as fast as he could before barging into the place. It just had to be the _one_ person he didn’t want it to be. He was midway through taking a deep breath, ready to shout profanities and threats if the person didn’t get out of his apartment _right now_ when he was interrupted by a quiet statement.

“Why do you hate me?”

The question was so confused and sincere that it stopped Derek in his tracks. He let the breath he’d been taking back out before looking to where he knew the speaker would be.

Stiles was stood at the far end of the room. He had his back to Derek and the doorway he’d just crashed through and was staring out of the huge window in front of him.

“Uh, what?” the now-bewildered werewolf asked. Stiles chuckled softly.

“It’s a nice place you’ve got here, Derek. Good view, too, despite the setting. Much better than the other lairs you’ve hidden out in.” The younger boy’s hand reached up to scratch the back of his neck nervously. He still didn’t turn around.

“What the- What did you say?”

“Come _on,_ Derek! It’s a simple enough question. It’s not like you can say that you didn’t hear me or anything. I know these things, remember, about werewolf hearing and stuff. I did the research. I’m research guy.” Derek supposed that Stiles’ words were supposed to come out as a joke, but he just sounded exasperated and a little tired. Tired of what, Derek didn’t know, but he guessed he’d find out soon enough.

First, he tried avoidance tactics. “Why did you break into my apartment?” He asked.

“I knew you wouldn’t even consider talking to me without me having to sit right on your driveway. Also, your locks are awful.”

 _‘None of that’s true’_ , Derek wanted to say, but he stayed quiet and kept the thought to himself. He decided to try asking something else, but before he could say a word, Stiles was talking again. The guy’s timing was impeccable.

“Don’t start trying to play twenty questions with me, Derek. It’s not going to work. I’ve just got the one and I would _really_ like you to answer it.” Now he sounded pissed off. “And before you ask, no, I’m not going to turn around and talk to your annoyingly gorgeous face like you probably want me to. I’m actually collected and serious for once and I don’t want to ruin all of that by seeing you looking at me with that disappointed scowl you always fucking give me, because that’s not cool.”

 _Ouch,_ Derek thought. He decided to try to ignore the comment about his face, since it was doing things to his heart and his head that he desperately told himself were equally not cool.

The next moment was absurdly long and silent, since Stiles usually couldn’t keep his mouth shut for longer than the amount of time needed to take a breath. It could have been ten seconds or ten hours, Derek had lost all sense of time at that point. Some part of his brain that was still working logically registered that the gap must have really been around five minutes, but his mind was too busy swarming with a billion thoughts, all with the subject title ‘ _Stiles’_.

Just by standing there and asking that question, Stiles had destroyed the mass of barriers that Derek had put up in his own mind and towards other people. The werewolf had finally achieved his masochistic goal – Stiles thought Derek _hated him_ – and he currently hated himself for even deciding to do it in the first place, along with everything he’d done since.

Derek had lied to Stiles. Lied to him in everything he did; lied to him so well that even another werewolf wouldn’t have noticed how he really felt. In doing so, he’d also lied to himself. He’d told himself time and time again that this was best for the younger boy, because Derek believed that should he ever show what his heart really felt for Stiles, that he would ruin his life. His past relationships weren’t exactly sunshine and smiles. With one of his previous partners being an arsonist that killed his family and the other one being an innocent girl that Derek himself had ended up killing out of mercy, his relationships were _not_ high on the ‘Happy Couples’ list. Stiles had already lost someone vitally important in his life. He didn’t want for them to get close and then for Stiles to lose yet another person, or for Stiles to be the one that was lost.

He never wanted that.

Now, though, the barriers were gone, crumbled away into nothing by a simple question. Stiles was tired; so was Derek. He was tired of lying. If he told Stiles and didn’t get the correct reaction, rejection wasn’t the worst that could happen by a long shot.

Derek sighed quietly. “I don’t hate you,” he said finally and Stiles snorted.

“You? Yeah, right!” The conversation had apparently reached the point of sarcasm.

Derek shot the back of Stiles’ head his legendary glare. Unfortunately for him, the eyebrow trick doesn’t quite work so well when the person you are trying to bore holes into the face of with your mind isn’t looking at you.

“I don’t,” Derek tried again sincerely. “If there was another werewolf here, they would be able to tell you that I’m not lying. I don’t think this is a conversation either of us would like to invite Scott to be a part of, though, so you need to stop being stupid and actually look at me so I can prove it.”

Without waiting for an answer, Derek stalked across the seemingly vast space between the two of them and grabbed the boy’s shoulders, making him look at him by force. He raised an eyebrow pointedly when Stiles finally noticed that he wasn’t actually giving him a look like he was about to bite his head off. “Now,” He said, grabbing Stiles’ wrist and placing his slightly shaky hand over Derek’s heart. “Listen to me. I _don’t_ hate you. It’s actually the complete opposite and it feels…incredibly awkward saying that.” He let go of Stiles’ wrist and let his arm fall limply to his side, watching as it slowly dawned on him that Derek wasn’t lying, along with what he had actually said.

“I-,” Stiles spluttered. “ _Oh my god_! I _hate_ you! I mean…what the hell! You fucking _asshole_! You complete and utter- ugh!”

Derek’s eyes widened as he felt hands grasp the collar of his shirt and pull him downwards. He braced himself for a punch, but then Stiles was kissing him and the entire world seemed to evaporate around them. He stood still for a moment, utterly shocked, before acting on instinct, deepening the kiss and placing a hand on the back of Stiles’ neck and pressing them closer together.

The kiss seemed to go on infinitely, but eventually the other pair of lips left Derek’s as Stiles pulled away. He furrowed his eyebrows, confused and received a mild glare in return. “No, Derek. I’m still mad at you. Really, really mad. You should actually talk more often – we could’ve been doing this _months ago_!” At this, a laugh escaped Derek’s mouth. It was the first proper laugh that he’d let out in a long while. Stiles hadn’t stopped talking, though. “…And what’s everyone going to say? What will _Scott_ say? What does this even make us? Oh my god. Is there some weird werewolf thing I should know about?!”

Derek chuckled lightly. “We’ll refine the details later. For now, however…” He said, and then his lips were on Stiles’ again and he decided he _really_ didn’t give a shit that the front door was still open.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, my multifandom mess of a tumblr is [ looking-for-sense-in-nonsense](http://looking-for-sense-in-nonsense.tumblr.com/) so you can find me there too c:


End file.
